People might not know how hard it was for me
to live solely on MealPlan when I was in my 1st year of degree, trying my
hardest to stay away from making loan. Yet everytime I saw my friends getting
paid *relatively* handsomely at that time of the semester, I could not help
from feeling jealous.
It was a tough year struggling my freshman
year without any sort of financial assistance, and having to see that everybody
who has taken PTPTN loan make it past the year with their brand new laptop and
some of them even have new mobile phones did not make it any better. The only
thing keeping me alive throughout the year is the RM448 per sem sum I had in my
Meal Plan card.
I think the first year was the year when I
had to perform so that I could apply scholarship for my second year and onward.
I remember having to wait for bus for 30 minutes, through rain and shine, to go
to the library just to use the computer to finish my assignments.
Alhamdulillah, after so many rejected
applications, the third sem, I was offered two scholarships; JPA and PNB (I
have to refuse one though, so I accepted JPA's offer). Some of my friends did
apply for the scholarships; but even with good results, they didn't make it. So
I do understand how that made them feel. they didn't have a chance to make the
difference.
But those who didn't work hard enough,
playing around with their laptops and whatnots, which they bought on their
loan, are the ones who, in my opinion, should not feel so bad about repaying
the debts.
True, not most people can achieve first class
honour, but having it as an excuse to condemn people who had given you your
borrowed convenience is not a pretty sight or a clever thing to do.
If you are so reluctant paying the loan, why
not show it by getting good results?
There are two alternatives for PTPTN, which are:
1- Get good results for 1st year, then apply
for scholarships the second year. Most of my friends who got 3.50 above were
offered JPA scholarship the 2nd year. And ALL of my coursemates who got at
least 3.60 (and applied for JPA) were offered the scholarship. 2 of them were
offered PNB.
2- Get first class honour so that you can
change your loan into a scholarship. Yeah, instead of screaming, cursing on
twitter, why not get yourself a first class honour first? I mean, it is indeed
a good alternative to screaming profanities and having to go through all those
predicaments of borrowing PTPTN.
People kept telling me that I could do it
because I was smarter than them, but I don’t think that they knew how much
struggle I put just to validate myself. My first year in university, I didn’t
sleep during exam nights, too afraid to lose the chance to perform.
I studied every single day, bringing books
with me everywhere I go. I admitted, I look like a stuck up bookworm, but I did
that only so that I could have a scholarship, thus getting my ass out of the
living hell.
I didn’t have money to buy new clothes, and I
wore the same pairs of shoes and slippers from the first day of studying to the
last day of my 1st year. I cut my hair only two times a semester, because the
money that I pay for getting one is enough to feed me for a day.
Some of you might say that I’m lucky, but
there’s not just luck in play when you are applying for scholarship. Work hard
is a better keyword. You just call others lucky because you don’t want to make
yourself feel bad for not trying and being lazy.
People who tried but didn’t make it – they
are the ones who have the right to feel frustrated. But when you didn’t try
that hard, you didn’t push yourself; then you should feel ashamed of even
trying to make an organisation who tried to help you in the first place to look
bad.
I’m not playing with the rezeki card here,
but how many of you perform solat hajat, pray (doa) invariably everyday for
scholarship? If you don’t do that, well what can I say. That is also a form of
effort.
Heck, I didn’t even ask you to do it every
single day of your academic years. Just for a year; just a year – sacrifice
things that you think are your convenience. Sleep less, play less, shopping
less. Give more time and efforts on studying. Just for a year.
Or in academic terms, just 32 weeks of a year.
Once you've got a scholarship on your second year, you finally can do so many
things that you've been craving for that darn first year; you’ll have money for
shopping better clothes, you’ll have money to purchase better laptop; and
you’ll have money to pay for a driving license.
Once you have a scholarship, you’re living a
decent life in university.
And most importantly, after you finally have
a scholarship in your second year, you can pay back the loan you have made in
your first year if the scholarship backdates, which is a great way to say “F**k
you PTPTN! I ain’t gonna be your slave!” Isn’t it great?
Consider this; you never work hard to get a
first class, you sometimes skip classes even. But when it comes to paying the
debts that you borrowed, you become mad?
That is quite an overreaction on your part.
Nobody says that PTPTN is a fair and just system, but not making an effort to
get out of the bloody system is just your problem in the first place.
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